Saturday, February 06, 2010

Date-ematics: It Equals 200

Well, I realized as I sat down to blog, that this is my 200th post. 200! I can't believe that I have posted that many times. 200 pieces of blackmail for all the world to read about me. Moving on... If you recall, I once did a fantastically nerdy post for my 50th post, and since I pretty much have no new ideas for blogging topics, I give you:

Date-ematics

Definition: The non-word "date-ematics" is not-so-cleverly contrived from the English word "date," which is a social engagement often of the romantic nature and "mathematics," which can be shortened to "math" or "maths," if you're not from North America. "Mathematics" comes from the Greek word "mathema" or something, which means learning, study, science. So, if we cram all of these together, we come to define date-ematics as the learning, study, or science of social engagements often of the romantic nature.

Elementary Date-ematics: One of the first things that we learn, even as young children, is that in order to learn about or study dating (or maths), one must be able to count. Starting at with one, the subject can then move to two, and then to three, until a sufficient understanding has been achieved of the subject matter (i.e. dating). The concept of zero exists, but it is understood that if the quantity of dates is zero, the learning derived from dating will also be zero. The same is true for a specific subject matter. If one wants to learn more about a particular subject in the sphere of dating, then the number of dates with the subject matter cannot equal zero.

Even our prehistoric ancestors understood this concept, as you can see from this photograph that I found of our prehistoric ancestors on the internet. And as you know, nothing on the internet can lie:



As you can see, our prehistoric ancestors chose to invent fire as their dating activity. It is my belief that even today, just as it was true for our ancestors, one can learn much from a date that involves fire.

Date-ematics Theories and Areas of Study: Alas, date-ematics is such an involved field of study with many theories. It has been studied for millennia, but even today, humans everywhere are still learning, studying, and theorizing about the subject. Some commonly-tested theories or areas of study:

Number theory, Group theory, Order theory, Geodate-ry, Date-onometry, Abstract dategebra, Differential Geodate-ry, Topdate-logy, Fractal geodate-ry, Measure theory, Calcdate-us, Chaos theory, Complex analysis, Cryptdate-graphy, etc.

Applied Date-ematics: Probably the most successful field of study is Applied Date-ematics. This field considers the use of abstract date-ematical tools in solving problems in the area of dating. Applied Date-ematics considers a whole variety of different, but related fields, such as: Date-ematical physics, Fluid dynamics, Date-merical analysis, Optimization, Probability theory, Statistics, Financial date-ematics, Game theory, Date-ematical biology, Date-ematical chemistry, Date-onomics, and the control theory.

I sincerely hope that you have enjoyed this partial discussion of Date-ematics. As you apply date-ematics into your life, I hope that it brings you as much excitement and happiness as it did these cavemen below:



This photo was taken prehistorically, which as you know means, pre-discovery of the internet, but post-discovery of The Gap.

8 comments:

Sarah said...

That was so entertaining... I can't begin to express how entertaining that was.

Dana Cheryl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dana Cheryl said...

I love how chaos theory remains the same...

Just wondering why we think our prehistoric ancestors didn't comb their hair? I think the big hair teasing phase originated in the 80's. No wonder those cavemen are so upset! They seem to have their finger on the pulse of current Gap fashion & we're always making 'em look like they came straight outta the 80's. That's make me made too!

Dana Cheryl said...

p.s. The inadvertantly coughed & hit the enter key without meaning to.

dub said...

Brilliant. If you ever make a "Look Around You"-like YouTube video out of this, I would love to help with it.

Wendy said...

ha ha ha. LOVED the prehistoric pixs!!! It seems that even my predecessors knew more about romantic stuff than me. But of course they did, how else would I be here.

julie said...

You are deliciously nerdy...I love it!

I'm glad our dating experiences are greater than zero. Here's to continued learning...higher education if you will. :)

warnser said...

Yeah, what they said. Awesome.