*Actual names have been changed to protect the innocent.*
Time: May 16
Place: Row 23
Reason: Vacation to
So there I was walking onto an airplane. It was really early in the morning for me. I was sporting a form of my vacation hair. It was the sort of do that I can wear after having slept on it, which I had done the night before. Life was good. It was a vacation. I had gotten a seat quite close to my travel companions. All four of them were in the two rows right behind me.
I sat down next to a fellow who looked like he was probably within five years of my age. We’ll refer to him on this blog as PJ because that’s the name I gave him. He was listening to his ipod. I greeted him, and he greeted me. I noticed the airline’s magazine cover. It had Evangeline Lily on it. She plays Kate in “Lost” on TV. I watch “Lost” (But I haven’t watched the finale yet. Don’t talk to me about it.), so my interest was piqued. Meh. They were interviewing her about
All of a sudden, PJ started to mutter. He was muttering the same thing over and over. I couldn’t quite tell what he was saying. It definitely started with an ‘s’ sound. It ended with an ‘cks’ or ‘x’ sound. “S-x.”
I began to be annoyed, and I went back to the crossword puzzle. Ah ha! The answer to one of the clues was “acceptance.” I continued struggling over the clues with little success. Time passed. The flight was over halfway done.
I began to feel claustrophobic. It was as if I just couldn’t sit far enough away from this guy! It was then that I realized why. He was taking up more than his share of the row! His leg was partly on my seat! The entire time that we had been flying, the armrest between us had been up! Why hadn’t I noticed before this? I felt very stupid and annoyed.
What was he saying? Six? Was he obsessed with the number six? Was it sex? What would possess a person to mutter the word sex under their breath? (Don't answer that.) Was he listening to the same song and only knew one word? Argh!!!
Finally it was time to land.
As we were preparing to leave the plane, I quickly communicated with my cousin Brianna the annoyance that was my seat mate. While going up the ramp into the terminal, Brianna caught a glimpse of PJ’s ticket. She informed me that it appeared that he would be on our next flight! Yikes!
I told everyone the story of PJ as we made our way to the next gate. Dub volunteered to switch seats with me and punch him if I had to sit next to him on the next flight. I compared my tickets to Betty’s and Brianna’s. I was on the row behind them. Good.
After only about five PJ sightings during the layover, we began to get on the plane. For some reason that I now don’t recall, I got on the plane a bit later than the rest of our crew. I walked up the aisle, spotting Betty and Brianna in their seats. And then I saw PJ behind them. Behind them! Ack! As I moved closer, I realized that he was actually two rows behind them. My seat was on the same row as Dub and Roxanne, which was in front of PJ.
And so it was that I gleefully listened to PJ converse with his seat mates behind me in Spanish. And so it was that I realized that I would have preferred to sit next to the puzzlingly-gendered and very talkative person that I had once on a former flight back from Washington D.C. And so it was that I began to contemplate the number six.