Saturday, September 23, 2006

I Am a 40-year-old Male Who Lives in His Parents' Basement

Now, obviously you know that I am not literally any of that. For those who don't know, I am actually a 28-year-old female. And I don't live in my parents' basement. I live in the upstairs of their house. Why would I title this post that? Well, it's because metaphorically, I am.

You see, I am on a continued journey, like most of us are, to find out who I am. I am always striving to figure out myself. What do I like? What do I want out of life? Who am I? What is my disposition?

I never really thought of myself as a Star Wars nerd or a Star Trek nerd or even a Sci-Fi fan. Not even a fantasy fan. But, if you analyze my movie choices, one would think that I am. When at the movie theater, you know how sometimes people will comment aloud whether they're interested in seeing a movie? Well, thinking back on it, I am typically interested in the Sci-Fi/Fantasy genre more than others typically are. Not only that, but there are a lot of movies that I'm just not interested in seeing. Such as chick flicks. I'm not indicating that I hate chick flicks because, believe me, I do like my fair share, but I am more skeptical of them, knowing that it's not the genre in which I typically like to watch movies. In fact, I think that three out of my top five movie genres are: Action/Adventure, Sci-Fi, and Fantasy (superhero movies are in one of those, right?).

How does this make me "a 40-year-old Male Who Lives in His Parents' Basement?" It doesn't. But, now you need to realize that I am a fan of The Simpsons. I quote the show often. I can quote the entire movie "The Princess Bride." My favorite board game is called "Wizards." I think that video games are generally fun. I don't date very often. I like living with my parents. If I go into a game store and there are smelly males there who have been playing role-playing games for days and have not showered, I automatically feel a sort of comradery with them. I have been Princess Leia for Halloween. I took kenpo karate and think that Chinese stylized fighting is really cool. I also like watching Japanese anime movies. I have a blog and comment online on other people's blogs. I walked by a television that had Star Trek: Next Generation playing on it, and I wanted to stop and watch it (but I didn't). I can liken Star Wars unto the gospel. I know who Wedge Antilles is. I like James Bond movies. I like Shakespearean plays, and I used to dress up as a rennaissance wench for my job. I liked wearing the flowered garland. I have seen the entire extended trilogy of The Lord of the Rings in one day (even though I have titled that day "the worst day of my life"). I can whoop anyone at Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit. I anticipate any movie that comes out about superheros. I even sort of enjoyed Daredevil, Elektra, and The Fantastic Four (I know some of you are crying out there at this confession.). I think a cool date would be going to an observatory and learning more about the stars. I am a nerd.

...and I've come to accept it. I've been in denial this whole time, but when my sister called me up this week, telling me that she knew that was me commenting on a website, I realized that my nerdiness is undeniable. Later that day, I was talking to one of my friends who shared some of my passions. I told her that I had recently come to accept that I am a nerd. She told me that she's known for the longest time that she was and that it was okay. I also have always known that I am a nerd. In fact, I have always been happy about being a nerd. I just never realized the degree and severity of my nerdiness. And it is a great deal of nerdiness.

Coming to accept that I am "a 40-year-old Male Who Lives in His Parents' Basement" has been hard. I mean, it's not my identity or who I am or anything because believe me, I am far more complex than that. But, it is a part of me that I have always perceived to be socially unacceptable. It's hard to see yourself in a way that you have always thought to be ... well, detestable, I guess. And it's not like I completely fit into that stereotype or anything. But, I have come to understand and see that part of me. I have recognized that there are some things that I like to do that previously I denied. And so, I would like to welcome the "40-year-old Male Who Lives in His Parents' Basement" part of me, even though it's already been there. I don't think that it will change anything, except perhaps my own outlook on who I am. I think I have gained a better understanding of my interests and talents, and I think that when you come to realize things about yourself, you only come to know better who you can be and what you can acheive to help others.


Jill - GlossyVeneer said...

Very well said. I have come to embrace some of my nerdier qualities, but I too find myself asking the same questions about myself. Do we ever really figure out who we are and what we want out of life? I don't know the answers to those questions.

BTW - the upstairs is a lot classier than the basement! ;-)

Cash said...

You aren't really a 40-year-old male living in his parents' basement, Cardine. Case in point: You're not obsessed with anime (in fact you can never watched Spirited Away again), and you don't own an X-box.

Cardine said...

Jill - I definitely think that figuring out who we are and what we want is a continual process.

Cash - True, but I watched "Spirited Away" because it was an anime and I own a PS2 and can really rock on Pump It Up Exceed.

booklogged said...

I don't still live at home, but I don't feel like I've grown up either. I love to play video games, went to see Men in Black 3 times, watched all 3 of the LOTR in one day, I know one quote from Princess Bride (which is more than I know from any other show!) and I'm a stinkin; 55 years old. Just about the time I figure out who I am or what I'm about life shifts. Let me just warn you, because now that you've declared that your are a 40-year-old male who lives in his parents' basement, things will change. Grab hold for the ride!

tearese said...

why cant you watch Spirited Away? I LOVE that movie!! Almost as much as Naussica and the Valley of the Wind. I saw the first one in a theatre BY MYSELF and had a great time. The second, I saw an American version when I was a kid, and have been looking for it ever since. They just barely released the full version in English this last year and I was sooooexcited.
Uh oh. Am I a 40 yr old male?

Cardine said...

Those ladies and the heads sort of creep me out. It's sort of like a love-hate with it. I can't watch it because of the ladies and the heads and the big baby. It freaks me out sort of. But, I like the premise of it.

tearese said...

It kind of disturbed me in the theatre, because I watched it without knowing the plot or anything about it. The pig part was very disterbing, as well as the big lady when she put her hand on Sen's shoulder in the study...but thats kind of why I like it too. The heads are a good creepy.